Fall is here

Summer has come and gone and now it is one of my favorite times of year, Fall. I love the leaves falling, the colors, the crisp air, the need for a light jacket and of course football filled weekends. So far Fall has not failed me and it has been great. I look forward to getting to the end of each week so I can watch my brother, the Utes and any other football that happens to be on. A few highlights and things that have been going on in my head and in my life lately.

Sarah and I started her birthday weekend off by going to Luke Bryan's concert out at USANA. It was amazing! The two openers were both good and then Luke came on and made the night even better. He is definitely easy on the eyes... and he can definitely shake it! The next night went down to the BYU vs Utah Game. Going to games with Sar are always a good time. It was fun to go down to Lavell Edwards for the first time and even better that we beat the Cougs again, for the fourth time in the last 4 years.

I had the chance to go down to St George this last weekend to see my good friend Chelsea's baby be blessed. He is the stinkin' cutest baby. I fell in love before I even picked him up for the first time. While in St George I had time to meet with old friends, and more importantly make it over to the temple. The timing of this trip, and the timing of making it to the temple worked out perfectly. I was able to spend some alone time thinking, pondering and praying my heart out. With no time obligations I spent some much needed down time at the temple.             

The past few months the Lord has taught me so much, waiting patiently through each lesson for me to figure it out. I know that our Father in Heaven is aware, not only is He aware but He knows. He knows us, He knows us individually. He knows our wants, our needs, our fears, our potential and our desires. I know this because I have grown closer to my Savior then ever before. Building a relationship that is personal and sacred to me.

One lesson that the Lord has been teaching me the last year of my life and even more so lately is having  faith and trusting in His will. At times it becomes so easy to become proud, thinking we know what is best for us, more importantly for our lives. Knowing we have our agency, the Lord allows us to choose the path we take each day. Thankfully He is there to make up the difference in our lives if we allow Him to. Sometimes even when our thoughts, ideas and motives are righteous and good the Lord has other things in store. But He will never push things onto us, we must faithfully submit to His will, then the blessings come. It is not always easy and it may not always be in the plan we have for ourselves, but it is, in the end what will make us the happiest, do us the most good and help us to become all the Father wants us to become. I know that when we can humbly and full heartedly submit to His will with faith, He can make us happier than we ever imagined. It is just that first step of faith, into the darkness and unknown and from there He will guide us and carry us to where we need to be.

 I know that life can be rough and everyone comes with their own trials and tribulations. We all have our own Gethsemane's, but luckily we never have to do it alone. I feel a spirit of gratitude and love for my Father in Heaven, for His awareness of me individually and His unfailing faith in me. I cannot imagine my life without knowledge of the gospel of Jesus Christ, I am incredibly blessed.

Hair gets lighter, skin gets darker.. Summer time

Wow seriously where does time go? I cannot believe that it is already the middle/end of July already. Summer has gone by so quickly, luckily it isn't exactly over just yet and there is still time to do some last things. Overall though, this summer has been a pretty good one, even though I haven't been on the boat as often as I'd like, it has been a good summer surrounded by amazing people who are apart of the memories made for the Summer of 2013. Here are some of the things I've been up to this Summer when I am not working...

Spending some time with my Australian family

One of my closest cousins received his mission call

Went to the George for one of my best friends baby shower

Fourth of July festivities.

Spending time on the lake

Going to Altonah for a few days and loving it.

Well folks thats all for now, Bear Lake is the next adventure and I can't wait! Hope these last few weeks of summer don't go too quickly... But then again the end of summer means football, jacket weather, fall, my birthday... after all so many good things are coming!!

Until next time...

Life as of Late

As usual I come and go on my blog, sometimes I am on top of it and blog quite frequently and mostly I let months go by in between posts.

It is so nice to be able to look back through my blog and see the growth and change that has happened in my life since I started with this silly journal for all the world to read.

Life is crazy busy as usual. Whats new with me? Not very much at all. Working 3 jobs is keeping my plenty busy. Summer is finally here and I couldn't be happier. Time to break out the boat and spend my afternoons off laying in the sun on the front of the boat.

I feel so grateful for my life, the people in it and the things going on. Life really is such a crazy ride, with twists and turns you would have never imagined. A year ago I would have never thought in a million years that I would be where I am, going through certain trials and meeting the people I am, but it is okay because I know who is in charge of my life, and what a glorious thing that is to remember who is in charge.

Quotes. Some simple, Some profound. All necessary.

I can't tell you why I am this way but I have always been a "quote lover". I am always looking for new quotes to read and learn from, laugh at, get motivation from etc etc etc... They always seem to help no matter what is going on. Here is a few that I have enjoyed as of late.

Music answers prayers, heals hearts

I believe that the Lord often answers prayers through music, enjoy.

Beautiful Heartbreak

Gentle Savior

The Lord is in charge no matter the outcome

  Sometimes in life I think we get ideas of how we want things to be, who we want to be with, how we want our life to pan out. We think we have it all figured out, what we think will make us the happiest....etc. But we also seem to forget who is really in charge of our lives and sometimes forget to let Him direct our lives. Something I have learned is that our plans are a nice gesture, sometimes we can be happy when we follow through with our own plans and ideas, and other times it may not turn out how you would want it to, or how you would expect it to.
This is exactly what has happened with me. I have had my own dreams and desires that I have been actively pursuing for the last few years of my life. I had all these wonderful ideas of how things were going to work out, how my life was going to be, and how incredibly happy I thought I was going to be. But slowly things started to fall a part, I couldn't understand why things were not going exactly the way I wanted or thought they should be going. I was so heartbroken, if my desires were real and righteous, why wouldn't the Lord let my dreams become my reality?
 As I started to think about what I was going through I realized that I had feelings all along that it may not work out the way I wanted. I wouldn't let myself think that, I fought myself for awhile. Hoping that the feeling would somehow disappear. I kept praying for things to go the way I wanted, that things would work out just the way I had imagined. As time went on this feeling that my dreams were not going to come true, never went away. I slowly started to realize that although the dreams and desires I had for myself were righteous, they may not have been the Lord's will. This was heart wrenching, these thoughts, ideas, and emotions were all I knew. I didn't know how to give them all up. At times I thought the Lord was asking to much for me to give up what I wanted for what He had in store. The fear of not knowing and going solely off of faith scared me to death.
I decided I couldn't ignore the promptings anymore, I had to make a decision. Up until this point in my life I had never done anything so hard. I realized that as scared as I was, I knew the Lord would provide, He would pick me up and help me to gain some perspective. Giving up all I ever wanted and knew hurt more than I can even describe, but I knew I had to do it.
  Since my decision it hasn't be easy, but the Lord is not unaware. He has surrounded me with the things I need to help me get through. My family and friends have picked me up and given me strength I could not find anywhere else. The Lord has answered multiple prayers by placing certain events, people or things into my life, with the timing being perfect. I am learning to really trust my Father in Heaven, to know that He is real, He is there and He knows.
  Last night I had the chance to watch the CES broadcast fireside with Elder and Sister Bednar. As I listened to the counsel and talks they had prepared, I felt that they wrote them just for ME. Elder Bednar shared a story of a newly wed couple, that soon after getting married found out that the husband had bone cancer and the prognosis was not good. They were so heartbroken, they were so scared of what was going to happen. Elder Bednar came to give the husband a blessing and asked them if they had the faith that the Lord could heal him. Both the husband and wife answered yes, and then Bednar asked do you have the faith not to be healed if it is the will of the Father? Do you have the faith to submit to His will? Elder Bednar said that before the Lord could heal the husband, the first had to have faith that he wouldn't. At that moment the husband and wife realized that they needed to "overcome through the atonement, the natural man tendency in all of us, to demand impatiently and insist incessantly the blessings we want and believe we deserve... strong faith in the Savior is submissively accepting of His will and timing in our lives, even if the outcome is not what we hoped for or wanted." The story goes on to say that the cancer went into remission, at least for awhile.
   I cannot see what will happen, I do not know the outcome of my circumstances. Maybe the Lord has something else in mind, or maybe it is not time for my specific dream right now but it will be someday. But I do know that the Lord can see all, He knows me individually and He will help be to become the Woman He wants me to become.
   I know that my Savior lives. I know He loves each of His children and wants us to be happy. He knows us better than we know ourselves. Even when it is hard, if we will submit to His will, He will bless us.
  Although my heart at times feels broken, heartache sets in, my dreams feel shattered on the floor, I know that when we pick up those broken pieces and hand them to the Lord He can make them whole.